Yo Mamma!
by smile-big.xx
Summary: Starts off as Truth or Dare and soon turns into a bet. Emmett gets into a Yo Mamma fight funny! read&review oneshot T to be safe REVIEW! i will write more if you REVEIW


A/N: Edward and Emmett make a bet

**A/N: Edward and Emmett make a bet. Oh No!**

Bella POV

"Edward, let's have some fun around here! We can play truth or dare!" I whined.

"Um, Bella…With who?" He asked cautiously.

"EVERYONE!" I exclaimed.

"Oh, I don't think that's a very good idea. Emmett has been trying to make a bet with me. It would be best if I avoided him."

"What kind of bet?" I asked, now curious.

"I don't know. But! Its Emmett's bet so I will be something competitive.

"Oh please please please please please please! Edward I _really_ want to play Truth or Dare!" I whined.

"Fine! We'll play," I knew he would give in! I just knew it!

**Little Later  
Edward POV**

It was my turn to ask somebody. Huh…who should I pick? Alice? No. Bella? No. Jasper? Maybe. Emmett? YES!

"Em, Truth or Dare?" I asked with a huge smirk on my face,

"Dare! Bring it on! Oh yeah!" Emmett exclaimed while throwing his hands up and down. I bet he thought he looked intimidating…but to me he looked like an oversized, over aged, baby throwing a fit. But it's shorter to just say Imbecile.

"Imbecile. I dare you to…Hm…" I looked around the room and spotted my sweet, Bella eating a disgusting looking granola bar.

"Eat a whole BOX of granola bars!" I practically shouted at him.

The whole family burst out laughing! Bella was bright red with tears streaming down from eyes.

"No!" Emmett shouted above the laughter.

"Chicken out then…" I raised a brow at him and, I too, broke into hysterical laughter at his expression.

But he did it. Overly dramatic…But he still did it.

"Edward! Truth or-"

I cut him off, "Dare." I stated confidently. He couldn't think of anything worse than that.

"I dare you to make a bet with me," he copied my confidence.

"What's the bet?"

"It doesn't matter Eddie-boy! A dare is a dare! Unless yow're too chicken to make a wiwwle bet wit your big bwotha!" He put his hand to his heart and batted his lashes.

"Fine!"

"Okay the bet is to see who can eat NOTHING but human food. Who ever caves must dress up like a girl, make up and all, go to the park and pretend to hit on other guys!"

"WHAT?" I asked.

"Jeez! I said ho ever caves first must-"

"-I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID!"

"Eddie, deal?" He extended his right hand. If I take him to a grizzly reservation he would surely crack!

"Deal!" I slapped my hand into his and shook it.

"Let's go down to the CVS and get some food. Maybe we will find something that looks reasonable." I suggested.

**AT CVS  
EM POV**

I paraded through the aisles looking for reasonable food to live off of. Then I saw about ten bags of Frito's. On the front of the bag said, "_**You Could Be a Winner! No Purchase Necessary!**_"

Whoa I don't have to pay for these Fritos? Awesome!

I picked them up and shoved them all down my shirt and up my sleeves. I didn't want Eddie seeing what I'm going to be living off of.

He was approaching me to tell me that he was going to pay for his stuff. He had containers of Peanuts. After he paid for his food I walked out of the store with Edward right behind me. A beep came from behind us and security grabbed Edward.

"We've got a shop-lifter! We've got a shop-lifter!" He called into his walkie talkie.

"What, sir! I'm no shop lifter. That would be wrong! Emmett! Emmett" he called to me. I was too busy laughing. Edward shoved the security 'lightly' but he practically flew into a wall. We bolted for the car.

When we sat down my Frito bag crunched.

"Em, what was that noise coming from your shirt?" He asked between clenched teeth.

"Um, Fritos…? What does it look like Virgie?" I taunted him.

He was silent the whole way home. When we parked the car he opened the trunk and put something behind his back. When I walked over to him he pulled out a baseball bat and hit me repeatedly with it.

Carlisle had to literally tackle him for the bat.

I was in so much pain! If I wasn't a vampire I would defiantly be dead!

**Week Later**

**Edward POV**

Bella and I were sitting on the couch. It was around lunch time and Bella was eating a sandwich so I decided I would eat my peanuts. I wasn't sure if u were supposed to bake them, salt them, or just eat them. I turned the package over and read the labels on the back.

_**Warning: Contains nuts **_well no duh! Under that it said INTSTRUCTIONS. Perfect.

_**Instructions: Open bag, eat nuts. **_Well now I feel dumb.

"What are you doing Edward?" Bella asked me giggling.

"Eating." I replied.

**Later:**

**Emmett POV**

"I'm out of Frito's!" I whined to Edward.

"I'm out of nuts!" he replied back.

I burst out laughing!

"That's because you're a 107 year old VIRGIN!" I snorted.

"Don't make me get the bat!" he retorted.

"Fine. Let's go and get you some NUTS!"

When we were out at the store some skinny Caucasian boy with baggy pants, an oversized tee, and fake gold chains, bumped into me.

"Ex-Cuuuse _me!_" I said to Skinny.

"Yo Mamma!" He shouted in my face,

I stomped my foot and chanted in a sing-song voice, "Don't make me snap my fingas in a Z-For-Mat_ion_!" I was having fun with this! I have always wanted to get in a Yo Mamma fight!

Skinny stopped and scoffed, "Yo mama's so fat, all the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama!"

I rolled my eyes and said, "First, don't get all up in my grill! Second, Yo mama's so fat, when she ran a way; they had to use all four sides of the milk carton!"

Edward came up behind me and grabbed my arms.

"Leave now Emmett!" he said in a stern voice.

Alice popped through the door and said she had a vision then sided with Eddie boy.

"No you guys! I'm _just_ getting started!"

"Emmett look there is a grizzly!" Edward yelped.

I whizzed around locked my eyes on my target and bolted at vampire speed.

**Edward POV**

Emmett bolted off and I had to follow him to visibly see him cave. Before I did that I showed the eratic teenager my gleaming teeth and snapped them in his face then bolted. Alice following behind us. I came there just in time and saw an elk. Emmett and I feasted on our dinner and then realized we _both_ caved.

"You caved first!" We both said at the same time.

"Actually!" Alice mused, "That wasn't the deal. Who ever _caved_ has to dress like a girl. Not whoever caved first. You both caved. You both dress up as girls!" Alice saw our faces and started laughing.

I looked at Emmett and said. "This is going to be a _llooonnngggg_ evening!"

**A/N okay so I know that that was stupid but it just popped into my head one day! I can picture Emmett in a Yo Mamma fight!**


End file.
